Two Jokes: A Boring Sermon and Two Nostrils

Two Jokes:  A Boring Sermon and Two Nostrils

Oct 30, 2018

A boring sermon A man goes to church.  The preacher begins his sermon.  Then he goes on…and on…and on…and on. Finally, the parishioner can’t take it any longer, angrily he gets up and leaves. On his way out an usher says to him, “Why are you leaving the service before it’s over?” “I have to get a haircut.” “But why didn’t you get a haircut before the...

Joke – An Attractive Blond

Joke – An Attractive Blond

Oct 30, 2018

An attractive blond A very attractive blond gets on a plane in New York City, going to Chicago. She sits in her assigned 3rdclass seat. As the plane reaches cruising speed the blond notices and empty seat in the 1stclass section, so she gets up and moves to it. The airline hostess comes to her and asks for her ticket.  The blond says “Sure” and hands the...

Joke – Suicide

A man walked into a hotel room and saw a dumb guy with a rope tied around his waist.  He was furiously tugging on the rope.  There was a chair nearby.  The visitor asked him what he was doing. The dumb guy angrily said:  “I’m trying to kill myself.  I can’t stand my life any longer.” The visitor said, “That’s not the way to...

How to tell a joke

How to tell a joke

Aug 7, 2016

One of the most boring experiences in the world is listening to a person trying to tell a joke when it doesn’t work.  Here are some basic rules of how and when to tell a joke. The most basic rule is to only tell a joke when it is to the right person or to the right group, at the right time. All jokes are created to only work with a specific audiences....

An Ideal Man

An Ideal Man

Jun 7, 2016

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi, which was just driving by.  He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing, you’re just like Frank.” Passenger:   “Who?” Cabbie:   “Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time.  Just like you coming out of the building just as I was driving by.  Things like that...

The Cruise

The Cruise

May 10, 2016

An 80-year-old couple booked a cruise to Europe.  After two days at sea, the captain came to the husband and said, “I just got a call from our home base.  Your wife never boarded the ship. We left her back in Miami.” The husband replied, “Oh, thank God, I thought I was going deaf.” (Note:  We can see here how a joke can be like a poem.  The lines have two or...

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